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Old 11-09-2021, 05:50 AM   #1
LegionX
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Seriously...!!!!

Full time RVing might not be our thing....

We've had to call the cops twice now in 3 months!!! I know a couple bad apples don't represent the whole lot of RVers but really!!!! 2 issues in 3 months!!!!

First my wife was scared out of her mind when a man entered the women's bathroom while she was showering, asking her inappropriate questions (she was alone in the bathroom). Last night our RV "neighbor" pinned me against the my RV for 20 minutes talking nonsense about my wife and I. I was able to get him to back up enough so I could run into the RV, lock the doors, and call the cops! I was actually concerned for my safety!!!! To the point of running through all the possible scenarios in my head of how to get away without going to the hospital!

He have pepper spray and knives but would rather not use them and I didn't have them on me as I didn't think that person was a threat. We even had a beer together a few nights prior with another RVer next to him. Sad that we even have to have weapons!

So far the bad experiences are outweighing the good ones...

Oh...for anyone interested. The first bad experience was at Illinois Beach State Park. This most recent one was at the Agricenter RV Park in Memphis.
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Old 11-09-2021, 06:07 AM   #2
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Wow. I think those incidents were isolated and you will likely not have those things happen again. Doesn't seem like RVing has anything to do with these things happening; you just ran into people who should have been dealt with. Pepper spray? Knives? We live in a very rural area and don't rely on pepper spray or knives if personal or home defense is needed as law enforcement is not the answer if an immediate attack or confrontation occurs.
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Old 11-09-2021, 06:31 AM   #3
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I know times are changing and with that comes a different mind set on how we have to handle ourselves when outside of our homes, if that be a stick-and-brick structure or one on wheels.

For us, we quit socializing with everyone when camping. It's not because we are not friendly, but because of strange people like you just encountered. We are not "unfriendly" toward anyone. We'll strike up conversations with folks walking their dogs when we walk our dogs, or if walking a trail and someone passes, or if gathering around the dump station.

But as far as sitting down and having a beer, chewing the fat, sharing a meal together, .... those days are over! We trust no one. We get close to no one. We don't invite and folks don't invite us. If they do invite, we politely turn them down. Sorry, just too many whack-o's out there to deal with.

We also absolutely DO NOT use the public facilities (bathrooms or showers) at any campground. Many years ago my wife was taking a shower when a boy, probably 12 years old came into the women's shower room and started pulling back the curtains on the shower bays laughing at the women. My wife said, never again. Our camper has a bathroom, a toilet, a shower, and she was using it and she's NEVER used a public facility again.

So, I have to dump the tanks, use a blue tote when we don't have sewer hook up, and pay attention to water usage more carefully. The trade off is .... we've never experience an uncomfortable confrontation with anyone since my wife's shower incident. Never.

We keep our distance, protect our privacy, and mind our own business. Times HAVE changed. We are not social butterflies, nor do we want to be. But, we are happy, and enjoy camping, and have experience no issues with anyone. We also very selectively choose our campgrounds too. The tougher the rules are enforced, the better the campground.
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Old 11-09-2021, 06:34 AM   #4
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Wow. I think those incidents were isolated and you will likely not have those things happen again. Doesn't seem like RVing has anything to do with these things happening; you just ran into people who should have been dealt with. Pepper spray? Knives? We live in a very rural area and don't rely on pepper spray or knives if personal or home defense is needed as law enforcement is not the answer if an immediate attack or confrontation occurs.
We get it and are trying to understand its not an RV thing BUT in comparison...all the places we've lived (apartments/houses) and traveled (in hotels) we have never had anything like this happen until doing the RV thing. So far our statistics say it is an RV thing.
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Old 11-09-2021, 06:36 AM   #5
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Old 11-09-2021, 06:46 AM   #6
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I simply could not imagine traveling this country and keeping to myself. Having a beer with your neighbor is simply part of the nomadic life on the road. I’m quite sure the Agricenter episode was isolated. What was the officer’s response to that situation? We have many friends stay there regularly and never a problem.
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Old 11-09-2021, 06:59 AM   #7
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I simply could not imagine traveling this country and keeping to myself. ....
Unfortunately, my wife and I have been burned horribly (in our past) because we had good intentions. These incidents had nothing to do with camping, but it taught us: trust no one, believe no one, don't depend on anyone, and people are not what they appear. We've been stabbed in the back, financially destroyed, and taken advantage of because we had good intentions and honestly thought we were truly helping someone or gaining a friendship. It takes only one incident like that in life and you learn to never get too friendly with anyone again.

For the OP, camping is wonderful. If you camp with a known group, or another family you know and are comfortable with, it's a fantastic experience to enjoy each other's company. But, like you experienced, if you rub shoulders with the wrong person, it takes only once to stain and scar your innocence for life.
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Old 11-09-2021, 07:01 AM   #8
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I simply could not imagine traveling this country and keeping to myself. Having a beer with your neighbor is simply part of the nomadic life on the road. I’m quite sure the Agricenter episode was isolated. What was the officer’s response to that situation? We have many friends stay there regularly and never a problem.
That was one of the big reasons we decided to do Full Time - meet people that are doing the same thing.

The cops were....like..."eh...he's drunk" type of attitude. I didn't press charges because it didn't get into an actual altercation. Just pinning me against the RV for 20 minutes and being very threatening. Maybe I should've pressed charges...I don't know. Wife and I are still very shaken so we plan on taking a few days to calm down and then discuss our options.
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Old 11-09-2021, 07:14 AM   #9
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It's not a RVing thing, boating, camping, fishing or hunting. It's an environment thing. Once rude/illegal behavior becomes ok to the city, county or even state. It only emboldens people to act out in your space, neighborhood or campground. The common problem of just respecting your property/space/home as people did in the past has went away in some areas. Why, in my opinion because the government makes excuses for these type of folks and expects us to live with it. I also think decades ago a lot of men would have just pushed the guy away or punched him for what was described. Now the fear is you will be arrested, which should never be the case at least in the USA.
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Old 11-09-2021, 07:50 AM   #10
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It's not a RVing thing, boating, camping, fishing or hunting. It's an environment thing. Once rude/illegal behavior becomes ok to the city, county or even state. It only emboldens people to act out in your space, neighborhood or campground. The common problem of just respecting your property/space/home as people did in the past has went away in some areas. Why, in my opinion because the government makes excuses for these type of folks and expects us to live with it. I also think decades ago a lot of men would have just pushed the guy away or punched him for what was described. Now the fear is you will be arrested, which should never be the case at least in the USA.
I did consider pushing him away and fighting but his state of mind was way out of sorts and I had no idea if he had any weapons or what he was capable of - much bigger guy than me. I've been in fights (bar fights in college) but prefer to find a different solution now-a-days...broken my hand one too many times, a single punch would destroy my bones.

UPDATE - the park managers are kicking him out today. He has to leave by 4PM or he'll get towed out. The wife and I decided to set new ground rules and will still continue the RV thing for now.

A bit more to the story....a few nights ago a different RVer invited me and my wife over to their campfire to have a few beers. That's when we first met the guy (let's call him Jim) - he was there too. That night my instinct was to stay away from Jim. He didn't seem all together - still nice and polite but very "in your bubble" type of person. After having some good conversations Jim went back to his RV. I stayed out and continued to talk with the nice couple. I mentioned my concern to them that I didn't have good feelings about Jim.....next time I'll pay more attention to my instincts!

Sad to say but one of our new rules is to be prejudice. Especially if it's a lone person in an RV that doesn't look like its been taken care of.
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Old 11-09-2021, 08:24 AM   #11
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I tend to be closer to David's (dutchmensport) approach with campground folks than a more "outgoing" mode. I do visit with folks superficially all the time but don't "rub shoulders" with anyone unless I've observed them and have a good feel about how they operate. I absolutely don't want anyone to feel comfortable enough to chase my wife into the bathhouse (we don't do that - we use the RV) or come visit me one on one and pin me next to my trailer.

In my younger years I did do a lot of random "rub shoulders", have beers etc. with folks I didn't know and I did have some situations like the OP had. Just because someone is in a campground/rv park does not mean they are "good" folks or a "good 'ol boy" just waiting to be your friend....many aren't - a person has to discern what it is they are dealing with before getting cozy. And in the event of someone coming into my camp and pinning me in a threatening manner against my trailer.....I don't believe in taking a "knife to a gunfight" so I'm always prepared like a good Boy Scout!

All that said I've never had anyone come into my campground or RV uninvited or do anything questionable - and I've been in some pretty seedy places. I have made friends, carried food around the campground to folks, helped RVrs with problems, shared spare parts etc., I just don't get "cozy, cozy" with them. It is a great experience and we enjoy every minute of it. We're not full time but we do spend approx. 6 mos.+ out in the RV so sort of "semi" full time. OP you're just getting your feet wet with this style of camping. Don't let these incidents early on sour you. Learn from them; modify how you approach unknown individuals; concentrate on having fun by doing whatever you enjoy and be very selective about who you choose to get close to. Good luck and happy travels.
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Old 11-09-2021, 08:31 AM   #12
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I simply could not imagine traveling this country and keeping to myself. Having a beer with your neighbor is simply part of the nomadic life on the road. I’m quite sure the Agricenter episode was isolated. What was the officer’s response to that situation? We have many friends stay there regularly and never a problem.
We feel the same way! That's what made the fulltime thing so enjoyable, meeting new folks. I agree that there were a couple that I could've gone without meeting, but we are all different.
A couple of things that I'd have done differently Legion,
#1 we bought a RV so as not to EVER use the public bath house again,
#2 you should've pressed charges against "Jim", now he's being forced out to another park & likely do the same or maybe worse, he needs help & pressing charges may have gotten him some.
#3 mostly because our rig was too big for most state parks we didn't stay at them, but I will say you'll find that there's a different type of folks in them. There's a different attitude between those weekend warriors in state parks & other folks like yourselves.
Don't stop fulltiming due to a couple bad experiences! It's a great lifestyle & you'll meet some great folks.
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Old 11-09-2021, 08:37 AM   #13
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Discrimination is what this is! Why use Jim? Why not Bill or George, anything but Jim!!! Coulda used Sue!
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Old 11-09-2021, 08:52 AM   #14
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There was a "romaine lettuce recall" a year ago. I still eat romaine lettuce.

There was a "hamburger recall" about that same time. I still eat hamburger.

There was a "Takata airbag recall" that's ongoing. I still drive my truck.

There was a problem with Trailer King tires "exploding". I changed to Carlisle and keep on towing.

There was an incident at McD's when some drunk shot up the lobby. I still eat at McD's.

There was a change in WalMart to "self checkout". I still shop at WalMart (although I prefer locally owned stores).

There was a "drunk playing loud music" in a campground last summer. He got "nasty" when someone asked him to turn it down at 11PM. I still go to that campgound when in that area.

There are some "crazy things" happening on the left coast right now. We still plan on returning to visit LA and San Diego, but probably not this year. They need time to sort things out and return to normal. I'll "give them the space to do that without me being there"...

Point is, things will happen that "spoil the moment"..... They aren't a "REASON" to change the way you do things.....

On the other hand, if you're looking for an "EXCUSE" to change, any one of them would suffice to be your "turning point".....

Be aware that "bad things can happen, but look for the good in what you're doing. For most of us, the good far outweighs the bad. For us, that's the "REASON" we enjoy RV'ing. When the time comes to stop RV'ing, we'll find some "EXCUSE", but not in the immediate future.
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Old 11-09-2021, 09:11 AM   #15
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Discrimination is what this is! Why use Jim? Why not Bill or George, anything but Jim!!! Coulda used Sue!
Watch out now! The incident this poor fella had to endure did occur in the Volunteer State and I am starting to get suspicious that we might have a miscreant in our midst! On a more serious note, FIRST, I don't drink. Second we have gotten to know folks in a campground setting and they turned out to be great folks. Guess your intuition about someone should serve as a warning bell if you feel someone is not quite right. Time to leave. Third, we all have different backgrounds but if you fear confrontation, avoid confrontation and if you don't fear it, be prepared if not trained for those situations.
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Old 11-09-2021, 10:46 AM   #16
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Discrimination is what this is! Why use Jim? Why not Bill or George, anything but Jim!!! Coulda used Sue!

Whoa, whoa!! I've got a significant other that resembles that remark!!
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Old 11-09-2021, 10:47 AM   #17
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There are a good many folks in this world that like to prey on those weaker than themselves. While it is best to avoid those individuals, it isn't always possible.

To lessen the probability of an encounter, I find it important to display an air of confidence and readiness. Not aggressiveness, just alert readiness.
While I'm too old and broken down to kick butt anymore, I don't let on like I couldn't..
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Old 11-09-2021, 10:59 AM   #18
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There are a good many folks in this world that like to prey on those weaker than themselves. While it is best to avoid those individuals, it isn't always possible.

To lessen the probability of an encounter, I find it important to display an air of confidence and readiness. Not aggressiveness, just alert readiness.
While I'm too old and broken down to kick butt anymore, I don't let on like I couldn't..
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Old 11-09-2021, 11:06 AM   #19
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Exactly, but you know what they say about old Texans and fighting. Too old to fist fight and too broke down to run...
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Old 11-09-2021, 11:34 AM   #20
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Exactly, but you know what they say about old Texans and fighting. Too old to fist fight and too broke down to run...
I resemble that remark!
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