I guess I'm the exception to the rule, but pulling into a gas station just doesn't intimidate me. My biggest concern is the overhead clearance. If I can get under the awning, I can get out of the parking lot after I refuel. Of course, I start planning my exit before ever turning into the lot. Once the turn signal gets turned on, I have already determined how I'm maneuvering through the entire process. Sure, someone may park in front of me and I may need to wait for them, but as for being "intimidated by the "what if I get ....". I just have never felt that kind of concern or fear about driving a rig with a trailer or two in tow.
Keep in mind that I almost always triple tow (double-tow for Russ) and that usually means a "forward only approach" without the benefit of backing up more than 10 or 15 feet.
I can't remember the last time I couldn't get close enough to the diesel pumps (in the front of the station if they were the only ones available). Getting to the fuel pumps and back out to the highway just doesn't seem to be a problem.
As for "planning days ahead for a refueling station"... Hell I can't plan at 11AM where we're going to stop for lunch at noon, so tomorrow's fuel needs ???? Ain't happenin' ...
I also don't "only watch the brake lights on the car ahead of me"... I always scan the brake lights/turn signals 3, 4, 5 or more cars ahead, watching and anticipating the traffic flow. It's just something that "comes with towing"... After a few trips, it gets easier and less stressful, and after many, MANY trips, it just isn't something to dwell on.
Pay attention to what you do and always have an "escape plan" before you commit to the location.
All that said, there are stations that when I see the "tall price sign and decide to stop, if, about the time I flip on the turn signal, if I can't get my "exit plan in my head" then I just don't turn in. Discretion is the better part of valor, not only in relationships, but also in refueling. If I'm not sure I can get out, I stop, look for a way to make it work and if I can't do that in my head, I don't stop at that station. It also helps to never get below about 1/3 of a tank left before you stop for fuel... Waiting until the "gas pump light is flashing and alternating with 8 miles to empty" before starting to look for fuel, well, that goes back to the discretion and valor part..... YMMV